The epitomy of playing through the pain.

When you are a mom there are no time outs or breaks. There is no one to turn the reigns over to and take a break. I mean yea, Chris, is there and if I really couldn't do something I was supposed to do he would cover for me. The thing of it is, is that when I told Maddie I would take her to the park, she takes it literally. At that point, there is no going back. No Substitutions, No Excuses. So what do I do when I feel like my head is going to pound off my shoulders? I take her to the park. Half and hour later, my head feels better and I just had a great time with my daughter. It's days like today that make your  realize how precious this time is with our babies, that they won't always be small, and won't always want us around. No matter how much I complain about wanting Chris to do more or needing time to myself. I wouldn't want to give up any of the time I have with Maddie because those are the times I am making memories.  I would choose laughing and playing with her at the park any day over taking a nap or doing laundry. Sometimes we just need perspective.

Waste.Of.Time.

Well yesterday was a bust. We had a meeting with the Administrator of Atrium Y and the Director of the Preschool and nothing was accomplished. Chris and I were with them for an hour and twenty minutes of talking in circles. Everything we said they had a rebuttal for, every concern we rose they had a defense for, and when we said we thought they should do more; they said that maybe we should take Maddie somewhere else. Is this what happens when you worry about the safety of your children?

The entire situation started when Maddie was bitten and they failed to notify us, twice. I asked the teachers what was being done in the classroom to discourage the children from biting and all she told me was that they were working with the family of the child(ren). They tell me that addressing biting to the kids only increases the bites because it draws attention to biting. So I guess there is no room in a preschool setting for children's books, movies, and songs about not biting or hurting your friends. If I hear the words psycho-social development one more time I might scream.

That was their rebuttal for everything. The kids that are biting have not developed empathy and they are working on this whole new curriculum to help develop the psycho-social awareness in children. She pretty much told me the only reason that Mad doesn't bite is because she is more mature than the other kids in her class. The funny thing is that there are two kids biting out of twenty and they are defending those kids instead of protecting the others. I hope that this is not what we have to look forward to in the coming years. I know that every kid has to be a winner, and that all kids are equal, and no one is better than anyone else, and all the crap... but that is not real life.

I think our children need to be well balanced. If that means that Maddie is disappointed when she looses a soccer game, does not get picked to be the lead in the play, or has to be called out when she does something wrong then I think that needs to happen. God forbid we tell our kids that they are doing something wrong or that they need to work on something more or harder so that they will thrive more later in life.

Are we moving Maddie's preschool? Not today. In the future? That depends on how this play out in the next few weeks. Why should Maddie's world be turned upside down because another kid can't keep their chompers off of her. Is it more traumatic for her to have her whole routine changed or getting bitten again?

I guess we will have to see what happens...hopefully not more of the same.

I'm married to a You Tuber...

Chris bought a new toy. He came home with a flip video camera (too bad he didn't have it last week for Christmas!!) today that he says he is going to use to make a you tube channel. Does Chris have what it takes to enrapture an audience that will follow his daily antics?! I guess we will find out. If nothing else I know that Mad will get a kick out of it. I guess if he is going to be on you tube anyways, he might as well be productive.

Vacation is over...

So the holidays have come and gone, and now life is back to normal. I had 5 days off around Christmas and had the opportunity to spend that time with my family. It was so nice to relax and spend time with my sisters, parents, and a lot of one on one time with Maddie. Not to mention my handsome nephew!

I have realized these last few weeks what an amazing child I have. She is so sweet, smart, and loving. I seen some of these kids that she goes to preschool with and some of the kids that she plays with on a regular basis for the little terrors that they are. In the little over a year that Maddie has been in preschool she has been bitten three times by three different kids. This may not seem like a lot to some people, but when my baby comes with with huge bruises on her cheeks, back, or arms... it is a MAJOR deal to me. I have spoken to the preschool administrator a few different times regarding my concerns about biting. She continues to tell me that it worse for the parent of the biter than it is for me, and that the kids who have bitten Maddie are not habitual biters. I'm not sure if she is trying to alleviate my concerns or just piss me off more. So now, we have a meeting set up for next week for Chris and I to sit down with the preschool administrator and also the executive director of the YMCA and talk about this problem. Who is this lady to tell me that someone else's kid hurting my kid is not a big deal?! Obviously this is an issue that needs addressed. I know that Maddie is not the only child who has been bitten in the past year. I guess my job this weekend is to dig up some research on 4 year old and why they bite. I really don't know what I think should happen, I just want me child to be safe.

On a seperate note... things are good for us. We had a great long weekend together with my family and just as our own little family at home. Maddie had a great Christmas full of love, laughs, & good food. Chris and I are doing well and starting to plan on a second baby (NO NEWS YET!). Life is good and I am excited to see where this new year will take us... besides out of Middletown!!

A New Beginning...

So over the last two years there have been a lot of changes in our lifestyle. Some good, bad, unexpected, and some for the better. It has been very emotional and not always easy to talk about. I am an emotional person but I try to be strong for my family. I did not handle things properly during this tumultous time. I kept things bottled up, did not confide in my family or friends, and pretty much just hid from the world. Not many things have changed in the last two years. At this point, I am pulling my head out of the sand. I am an intelligent person, who works hard and does a good job of providing and caring for my child, and I want my life back. I do not want to be ashamed of the decisions that we had to make to get our life back on track. This is my road to do that.

Life is not easy...still. What gets me through the hard days is knowing that I am coming home to a husband that loves, a daughter I adore, and that I have a family to depend on when I need them. I may not always be able to do exactly what I want to do, when I want to, but if it is really important I know that we will work it out. We always do.

I'm going to start the new year with a new mind set. This is us, I am proud of myself and my family. Here we go!!